Talk like a pirate day
by Rinzlerf4tu
Summary: It's talk like a pirate day! so France England and a few others decide to put on their old pirate gear for the day! CRACK ENSUES! Warnings: Lots of FrUK, swearing, mentioned boy x boy, adult situations


Francis strutted into the meeting room in his old pirate clothes, a smirk on his face, and a rose in his hand. Two other countries had dressed up as well. England and Italy. France swayed to Seychelles and held out his rose to her and bowed. "You touch me and I cut your balls off." he shot up and walked quickly to anywhere else in the room. France quite liked his balls and preferred to keep them.

Just then he noticed there was no Germany about... He looked at Italy and began to chuckle. England perked up "Who the bloody hell did that?" manny of the countries had been making fun of France and England's "special" relationship as well as the laugh France did whenever he got a dirty thought or two and how England reacted. From across the room France raised a hand and England turned red. Just then Italy began to hug him. "I love dressing up as a pirate with you England! It's always so much fun! Too bad Germany couldn't make it today." "Will you please stop clinging to me Italy? Even if we are dressed up this is still a world meeting and we have to be professional." just then France popped up seemingly out of nowhere in between them. "Honhonhon~" Italy immediately let go, got up from his seat and began running around the room. "DON'T RAPE MEEE!" "But you're so cute in your little pirate costume~ " and France began to chase him. Just then Japan piped up to save Italy. "France don't! If you rape Italy then Germany will kill you!" France stopped in his tracks and his face grew pale. He ran back to his spot next to England. Another thought came to France's mind... He took his arm and wrapped it around England's waist pulling him closer. "What are you doing shit beard?" "Oh Angleterre, you can't possibly wear that outfit without expecting this from me." "Maybe if we were alone but-" just then he looked up and saw Sealand standing behind them on his toes, his arms up, and his hands in the shape of a heart... England jumped up and started to strangle his younger brother when he herd Seychelles and Estonia laughing hysterically. He turned his head to see they both had their cell phones out recording France and himself. His face flaming red now he stole their phones and smashed them in his hand.

The rest of the meeting went smoothly aside from a few winks to Italy and kisses blown to England. Both of which got France the death glare from England. They broke for lunch and Japan realized he had to go so he he couldn't join them. France sat next to his angletare and they were soon squished together (quite awkwardly) by Italy. France revived a blow to the head for this. "pour quois?" he asked rubbing the back of his head. "Because your squishing me you git! Why are you so bloody affectionate today?" "It's not me mon amour, it seems to be everyone else who is putting us like this." England didn't believe him in the least... Lunch continued like normal for a while after that until Italy decided it would be fun to steal Sealand's juice box. Soon there was an all out war between Sealand and for some reason Australia with Italy waving his white flag while grape tomatoes were bouncing off his head. After the mini WW3 the time came for the next break before the meeting started again. England and France attempted to get up but France was randomly shoved into England by Australia sending the two of them to the ground. They could have sworn they heard him say "Now kiss" they got back up straightening their costumes. "Careful! These are very old and will tear or get dirty if you keep shoving France and I around like this!" "Whatever mate, you should have seen your face though!" "Yah! You looked like a tomato!" all three of them turned to see Spain standing there, also in full pirate garb, laughing manicly. "When the bloody hell did you get here?" "Um mi amigo, I've been here this whole time. I was chatting with Canada." France and England let out a collective "Who?" and Spain laughed. "I suppose invisibility is contagious then..." they all heard a faint "Sorry" from somewhere in the room.

The second half of the meeting went normally except today when France and England started to fight swords got involved. Thankfully the two quit while they still had all their body parts. A few hours later the meeting was over and everyone headed back to their hotel rooms. England and France were walking back together when suddenly a wild Sealand appeared. "So when you two get back to your room are you gonna have sex?" they both stopped dead in their tracks. England was now completely red and even France was blushing from the sheer randomness of the question. "YOU DON'T JUST ASK SOMEONE THAT!" England yelled, red and flustered. "Besides who the bloody hell told-" England stopped mid sentence as he slowly turned his head to France. "I had no choice!" he said with his arms up as England went for his weapon again. "He was asking why we slept in the same bed and I didn't want to lie to the boy and-" England cut him off when his sword touched the Frenchman's neck. "I swear if you corrupt one more child I will personally castrate you." In a mix of fear and arousal France tried to change the subject. "Honhonhon~ that costume is making you act so dominant... Maybe i'll let you top tonight~" he said whispering into his lover's ear. Blushing England turned to where Sealand was supposed to be. The child was no where to be found. " I bet he ran back to Sweden and Finland." France said kissing England on the cheek. England sighed "I'll probably get another phone call from Finland about traumatizing Sealand again..." France was planting kisses all along England's neck now causing him to blush deeper. "Not in the hallway bloody frog." And with that they made their way back to the room.

-•-

**Finally done! Gah, it takes me too long to write these things...**

**Anywho about 25% of this story is true. For talk like a pirate day I had dressed as pirate France and my friends as England and Italy at school. It was awesome. Spain wasn't there though. Most of the FrUK actually happened (except the intimate stuff, that would be weird.) Canada was kinda there though, I've been declared as Canada in our group (the weird pervy Canada) so I had to throw him in there!**

**So yay I'm done! Unless you want me to write a sequel of what happens once they're in their room but that would be 100% made up and mostly just pwp (which I've never written before...)**

**So yah, REVIEW PLEASE! Or else I won't know if I should continue or not!**


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